Memories and Wishes

What do these memories mean?
How can I know that my memories are true
and real?

Sometimes it seems
that these are just
the stories that I tell,
(the stories that I tell myself
so I won’t forget)
about what was
and what I’ve lost
and what I desire back
from the past -
I don’t know if
anyone cares or listens
The characters in some of these stories
are gone – some dead now.
So, I alone tell my stories
without anyone to verify their truth.

Was it real?
My brother, once for a while
like a best friend
now I don’t even have a brother.
If dreams are a form of wish fulfillment,
as Freud said,
then perhaps ,
in that state of mind,
when and where I write
my poems,
is a road to my unconscious.
Then in another memory
Grandma says, “don’t hurt Bruce.”
“But I’m bad,” the 10-year-old
Bruce thought.
It’s unfortunate that she is
but a memory.

How I miss that love!
How I miss her!

-    Bruce Whealton 2009

Note on above:  Freud called dreams the “Royal Road To The Unconscious.”  Healing and health came from gaining awareness of unconscious, repressed thoughts or desires.  In some of my poems it seems that I am letting the Muse speak to freely and offer insights or increased awareness of things that were hidden.

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